Tag Archives: horror

Treatment 145 – Piranha ’78

PiranhaActionHooray! It’s SCHLOCKTOBER!!!

And, as is our tradition, we watch a slew of awful horror films that you, the listener, selected in our Schlocktober Poll! And who could possibly not be excited, happy, and looking forward to such a fun thing?!? Well, Matt, of course. But who besides Matt? Nobody! So without further ado, your fourth place film from the poll!

Piranha ’78

Yes, it’s yet another killer animal film from the seventies!! Man, did they have issues with nature back then, or what?!? Anyway, this one’s all about killer fish, and features lots of people making very stupid decisions. Also, some occasional boobs, and some occasional fish making “nom nom” noises as they devour people.

DIVE… into an amazing mailbag segment that’s full of people talking all about Creep Van, for some weird reason!!!

WADE… right off the deep end, when the guys discuss how to kill fish, and Doug consults General Electric!!!

SINK… your teeth into yet another episode where Matt criticises Kirk, Marc criticizes Matt, and Kirk consults “Genital Electric!!!”

This week’s movie is available streaming on Netflix, if you want to check it out. Also, if you’re enjoying the podcast, PLEASE SUBSCRIBE on iTunes! Also, drop us a rating, while you’re at it! Every rating helps us to get noticed by other listeners. If you’re a Stitcher user, be sure to favorite us!

Next Week: We head into week 2 of Schlocktober, and the 3rd place winner, Dreamscape!

Treatment 127 – Orca: The Killer Whale

OrcaThis week finds Kirk returning to the show, and all of us back to full form. And by “full form” we of course mean that we are making offensive jokes about whale abortions.

Orca: The Killer Whale

Yeah, this is a bit of a weird one. The film is well made, by Dyno Denelorits, so it’s not that. It’s also pretty well acted by the likes of Richard Harris and Bo Derek, to name a few. It probably has something to do with the godlike intelligence attributed to Killer Whales by the screenwriters.

JUMP… for joy as the guys discuss the origin of the semi-colon!!!

SWIM… in a sea of laughter, as Doug and Kirk have a case of the giggles while discussing whale porn and menopause!!!

KILL… another hour listening to rambling discussion, dumb jokes, awful puns, and Marc having to turn off Matt’s mic as he continually attempts an awful whale song impression!!!

Orca: The Killer Whale is available streaming on Netflix Instant, as usual. When you’ve finished watching that, please drop by the iTunes store, and write us a review! We love when people support the podcast! We also love Stitcher users, so if you’re on there, please add us to your favorites and give us a thumbs up!

Next Week: SHAKMA!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Treatment 125 – The Prophecy II

Prophecy2DanzigChris Walken is a legend unto himself, and yet we didn’t choose this film because he’s in it! I know, hard to believe right?! So then why did we choose this film? Well, because our special guest, Mr. James Greene Jr. wrote a book all about The Misfits, called This Music Leaves Stains! Still don’t see the connection? Well, you will for 2.7 minutes of the film, when Glenn Danzig makes an appearance!!

The Prophecy II

Yep, it’s a war between angels, and Chris Walken is leading the charge. Also, Russell Wong is seducing Jennifer Beals to make an Angel/human hybrid super-warrior. And also….I dunno, that’s about the full extent of sense being made.

KNEEL… in reverence as James reveals the full, immense awesomeness that is Glenn Danzig‘s acting career!!!

WORSHIP… at the alter of schlock as Doug pulls out his Walken impression (by popular demand)!!!

PRAY… for death, as the show drags into After Movie Dineresque lengths!!!

As ever, this week’s film is available to watch streaming on Netflix Instant. Also, if you’re looking to learn all about The Misfits, you can find James’ book in our store under “other things we like!! The paperback will be available in fine store everywhere in October, so keep that in mind as well!

Next Week: We get adventuresome and watch Remo Williams: The Adventure Begins!!!

Treatment 124 – Carnosaur

CarnosaurIt’s back to the horror genre for us, and back to films that fail with a classic bit of cheese from Roger Corman, the king of b-movie crap!

Carnosaur

It’s the attack of the killer dinosaurs, and viruses, and chickens, and Clint Howard! This movie has something to hate for everyone! There are bad effects, there’s an incomprehensible plot, there’s Clint Howard, so much to hate!!!

RESEARCH… a science thing or something, when Marc shares a letter from someone shilling for a spellcaster!!!

EVOLVE…into a higher form, as Kirk and Matt start finishing eachother’s sentences!!!

LAY AN EGG…as Doug performs Was (Not Was), Wesley Willis, and Paula Abdul songs, among others!!!

As always, find Carnosaur on Netflix Instant, if you feel like watching something to make you hate life. Then head to iTunes, and rate the podcast for us! We appreciate your ratings!

Next Week: Special guest James Greene Jr., author of This Music Leaves Stains: The Complete Story of The Misfits joins us on the show to talk about Glenn Danzig in The Prophecy 2!!!

Treatment 120 – D.C. Cab

DC BuseyIt’s finally here!! Hoorah!

April’s Fools is upon us! And we kick this one off with the fourth movie of your choosing from the April’s Fools listener poll. We also kick it off with a special appearance by After Movie Diner host, raconteur, singer, and general Radio Flange Goblet weirdo Jon Cross!!

D.C. Cab

Off to a whacky start in our schlock comedy experiment, we come out of the gate with the amazing Gary Busey, the motivational Mr. T, and Jayne from Firefly. Quite a combination. We have some varied opinions on this one, and the discussion gets heated.

HAIL…hail, the gang ain’t here. Matt and Kirk both bow out this week, like jerks!!!

WHISTLE… at the impressively bottomless general movie knowledge of Jon, as he bores Marc and Doug with movie facts!!!

FARE… thee well, as we reveal the cruelest joke that Netflix ever played on Matt Ringler!!!

D.C. Cab is streaming on Netflix for now. Be sure to check it out, so you know what the heck we are talking about! Also, so you can see Busey’s weirdly manic performance! Also, be sure to head to iTunes and RATE THE PODCAST!!! We need your reviews, so any ratings would be much appreciated. If you’re a Stitcher user, be sure to add us to your favorites, please!!

Next Week: April’s Fools continues and our comedy experiment moves on in the poll! Unfortunately, our 3-way tie for 1st place had a casualty!! The Secret of My Success dropped out of Netflix Instant! YOU BASTARDS!! The good news is that we’ll be watching runner-up The Golden Child instead!!

Treatment 117 – Spellcaster

PaintingMonsterIs it the 80s? Is it the 90s? Is it a vehicle for a washed-up rocker? Or is it a shitty movie with a 5 minute cameo from a washed-up rocker who was doing the film-makers a favor by even appearing?

Spellcaster

Adam Ant makes his Schlock Treatment debut (lucky him) in this intensely schlocky bit of 90s horror cinema that feels decidedly 80s. Bunty Bailey makes an appearance as well, as though someone should know who she is. She was in the Ah-Ha video, in case you’re wondering. Also, keep an eye out for the old Edwardian gas mask guy from She.

DANCE… your best interpretive dance, as Marc and Matt discuss the art of spellcasting through dance!!!

TEASE…your way through the “Next Week’s Movie” segment, as it keeps dangling temptation in front of you and then snatching it away!!!

DRINK…yourself to oblivion to get over the constant abuse being hurled by the members of this freakin’ podcast!!!

Spellcaster is available streaming on Netflix, and you can find it in parts on YouTube. Also, be sure to check us out on iTunes to write the podcast a review, or head to Stitcher and favorite us!

Next Week: We’re covering Lone Wolf McQuaid Hard Target The Hunted Death Wish Black Dog, with Patrick Swayze and Meatloaf!!!