Tag Archives: franco nero

Treatment 251 – The Visitor

800__the_visitor_04_blu-ray__blu-ray_We’re over the quarter-centennial mark, and beaming back from that distant cloud. The Myspace Boys get biblical, or mystical, or confused anyway, when we welcome…


Doug crosses the Taylor-to-Taylor-to-Taylor bridge!

Matt pitches a whole new kind of Gillman show!

Next week: The After Movie Diner’s Jon Cross stops by to help us do a slightly (slightly) more traditional take on Christmas, the Hulk Hogan’s Santa with Muscles!

Treatment 63 – Enter the Ninja

"It's a living!"

The great Sho Kosugi and the wondrous Franco Nero make their triumphant returns to Schlock Treatment in this episode! It’s a movie that we’ve been wanting to cover since the inception of the show!

Enter the Ninja

Yep, it’s another cheesy ninja film, and it’s every bit as awful as the other Sho Kosugi films we’ve seen. There are pointless backflips, unconvincing white ninja masters, ridiculous uses of ninja weaponry, and plenty of villains in white suits!

FLIP… for ninjas that will only kill for “good causes” and issue a “license” to ninja!!!

SNAP… the neck of boredom as the guys discuss the embarrassment of wearing a wet white ninja outfit, and the strange world of ninja sartorial choices!!!

EXPLODE… pointless clouds of smoke around the idea of properly wording one of those jokes where you say “Marc puts the [x] in [something with ‘x’ in it]!!!” (Apparently some people don’t have to make sense to get laughs.)

As always, this week’s film is available on Netflix Instant! You can also look for Enter the Ninja on demand or on DVD from Amazon through our store! Please be sure to subscribe to the podcast on iTunes, and drop us a rating if you can!

Next week’s episode: Tim Curry, Ernie Hudson, and Bruce Campbell return to the show in the famously bad Crichton adaptation, Congo!!


Treatment 45 -The Mercenary

Oh, man. This is a bad one. I mean this episode is a bad one, not so much this week’s movie. Somehow, we just couldn’t do it this week. We’ve decided to take the bold step of warning listeners to stay away. If anything, just listen to the first and last 10 minutes, and skip the rest. That way you’ll hear us read some letters, and pimp our upcoming Schlocktober movies.

The Mercenary

The film isn’t a bad one, it’s a decent spaghetti western with Jack Palance (our old pal), Franco Nero, and Tony Musante. Frankly, it’s short on schlock. Does this mean it’s too good of a movie for this podcast? Well, we’ve covered better movies, IMHO. But it doesn’t have that special combination of goofiness and incompetence that we come to expect from our films on Schlock Treatment.

WEEP… as the guys try to say something…anything…about this week’s movie, and conversation slowly devolves into a free-form discussion about nothing in particular!!!

LAMENT… as Marc denounces the evil that is Matt‘s weird pair of Charles Nelson Reilly glasses (see photo)!!

BEMOAN… the collapse of all things Shlock Treatment as Doug leaves the room, Matt shuts down, Marc resorts to hurling epithets, and Kirk tries desperately to hold it all together!!

If you are a masochist, feel free to find The Mercenary on Netflix Instant, watch it, and then listen to our show. Frankly, we don’t recommend doing any of those things. About the only thing worth listening to in this entire episode is the announcement of the winners of the Schlocktober Poll! It definitely looks like things are going to get better in Schlocktober, so get on iTunes and subscribe to the podcast!

Next Week: The 3rd place winner in our Schlocktober Listener Poll, Creepshow!!